Supporting Aging Parents Abroad, A Practical Guide for Families Living Overseas

Many of our clients have aging parents abroad.  Dealing with their affairs from afar can be challenging.  You are not nearby to monitor daily activities and ensure their safety.  However, from afar, you can still serve as an advisor, whether financial or personal, and if you structure your advice, you can help them enjoy their golden years.

Keeping Track of Daily Expenses & Monitoring Care Needs

It is very important to be aware of your parents’ finances, especially if you are not located nearby to monitor their activities. 

Help your parents to set up auto payments of their utility bills, mortgage payments, homeowners association payments, and tax payments so they do not miss important deadlines.  The last thing you want to encounter when you come home for a visit is a drawer full of unpaid bills.  Try to avoid this by setting up auto payments, and then you can monitor everything online from abroad.

Monitoring your parents’ everyday expenses is essential to ensure they are not spending unusual amounts on frivolous purchases.  You may not have the same priorities or spend as much on golf or gardening, but these are normal expenses to keep them busy with their hobbies.  What you want to look out for is large amounts spent at a department store or given to a charity.  This may be a sign that they are not spending wisely and may be a victim of aggressive sales tactics.

You also want to monitor the accounts for fraud. Be on the lookout for large amounts being given to people your parents employ or to charities that seem suspicious.  If your parents donate to numerous organizations that sponsor the same kind of activity, you may want to inquire to see if they are aware of the donations.

You will want to ask about any long-term care insurance that your loved ones may have.  These policies offer numerous benefits and should be utilized when necessary.  Usually, the insured must be unable to do two activities of everyday living (Bathing, Eating, Dressing, Toileting, Transferring). Check the benefits of the policy.  Do not let the policy lapse, which typically occurs due to non-payment of premiums.  These policies are very expensive now and generally impossible to replace.  Many policies offer benefits for assisted living facilities, nursing homes, and home care.  They typically have a maximum benefit and a length of time that the policy will cover. If your parents have these policies, they can save hundreds of thousands of dollars in healthcare expenses.  

If you have family members who live closer to your loved ones, you may want to ask for their help with monitoring and checking on your parents' daily activities.  They do not have to be involved in caring for your aging parents, but it is important that they monitor the staff that is caring for them.  If you do not have a family member nearby, there are many agencies that can provide services to elderly clients.  These include Medicare Advantage plans that reimburse for nursing service for a few hours per week.  If more is needed and no family members live nearby, there are private agencies that can help. 

If you come to a point where institutional care is needed for your parents, try to find a facility near to a family member, if possible.  People have busy lives.  If your elderly parent needs institutional care, it is important that they are close enough that family members can visit.

Estate Planning

It is simple to ask your loved ones to add you as a trusted contact or to add you as a joint owner or give you power of attorney (POA) over their investment and bank accounts.  Each institution will have their own set of forms but once in place, you will be able to help them with their accounts.  As a joint owner or POA of the account, you can monitor the cash flow and assure that they are safe from scams and financial predators.

Be sure you have access to your loved one’s estate planning documents.  These include wills, health care proxies and powers of attorney.  These documents should not be locked in a safe deposit box that no one can open. Be sure your name is on the title of the safe deposit box and you have a key.  If your loved one does not want to share the documents with you, be sure that you know where they are or the name of the attorney that has a copy.

 Be sure that the executors, trustees or other people that are named in the will and other documents are still able to serve.  Many documents get old and the primary or contingent trustees named in the documents are gone or unable to serve. Estate planning documents should be reviewed every five years to be sure everything is still current.

Living abroad poses other problems when you are named as trustee or executor of an estate.  Review the documents with an attorney in your current jurisdiction to be sure that no foreign estate taxes or inheritance taxes are triggered by your inheritance of the “foreign” assets.  Many countries have restrictions on foreign trusts.  In the US, trusts are much more common so be sure that your loved one’s documents have flexibility in them so that any undue circumstances will not be triggered.

Provisions for moving abroad

If you do not have immediate family living close to your aging parents, find out what options you have if you wish to or need to relocate them  to your country of residence.  Research visa types in your country of residence and whether your parents might qualify for the various categories.  An Adult Dependent Relative (ADR) Visa in the UK allows an elderly parent to come to the UK if they require long-term care that is not available or affordable in their home country, and there is no one else who can reasonably provide it.  Many other countries offer the same.  Check with the authorities in your country and, if necessary, consult with an immigration attorney.

Lastly, of course, check with your loved ones to see if relocation would be agreeable to them.  Many people want to stay in their homes and familiar surroundings so uprooting them would not be a good idea.  Others welcome the adventure.

Every family is unique and you will need to work through difficult circumstances, but by taking some preventive steps and keeping the dialogue open you will be able to keep your elderly loved ones happy and healthy for years to come.

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